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TRANSCRIPT

HOW TO FIND THE STRENGTH TO SUPPORT YOUR KIDS AND THEY STRUGGLE WITH DIVORCE

Hi Sweet Friends,

I’m Panache Desai.

Our children are often seen as the casualties of divorce. And in fact are one of the greater reasons why the majority of couples who are currently in relationship but yet have to fully realize the passion and love that’s available to them will continue to exist in their dynamic that leads to greater levels of unfulfilment.

Our children are so evolved, they’re so empathic; in some ways they are already aware of the relationship dynamics that you and your spouse are only just discovering.

It is for this reason that I’ve discovered that honesty and transparency to the degree to which it is responsible based on their age, is the necessary antidote to help them move into a place of understanding and awareness around how life is going to look like now in your household.

One of the biggest complaints that I hear from divorcees is that they are afraid to continue to expose their children to certain behaviors that their ex demonstrated on a regular basis. They are worried that they are going to present some fragmented picture of what love is and how love is supposed to play out in our lives.

I want you to know that children, of their own volition will begin to find new archetypes for relationship. They’ll begin to find new ways to engage in life, that ultimately, as much as you feel as though this experience may be scarring them, it isn’t.

Your decision to move into a more loving place within yourself will provide them greater access to love and peace within themselves.

Sometimes it’s the hardest decisions of all that lead to the greatest amount of growth, and our children, being at the forefront of our experience, are the pioneers and the leading force that propels us on into that yearning.

Because the truth is, my beloved friends, sometimes you just can’t do it for yourself but eventually you’ll get to a place where you will want to give them a different blueprint for what relationship looks like.

And so right now, meet your children with transparency and openness. Provide them a framework, a level of certainty around what life is going to be like post the breakup or post the completion of the divorce.

Allow them once again to find some stability and structure and as much as possible, consciously uncouple knowing that the more you and your spouse are on the same page about how you would like to show up for the kids, the more you’ll be able to create pathways and conscious avenues of exploration so that they are guided into greater levels of love and appreciation for the parents that they have.

It’s really up to you how life unfolds from this moment on. And more often than not, children serve as an accelerating catalyst to help us reconcile everything within us.

They have this ability to reach into us and touch our hearts in a way that nobody else can. So be open to their love. Be honest with them. Don’t hide your feelings from them. Allow them to be there for you as much as you are there for them and don’t worry and don’t be afraid.

What you are going through will not impact them in any way that will be to their detriment. In truth, this is a part of their greater journey. This is something that they have signed up to experience, and in turn, it will serve as an empowerment touchstone that will guide them into a greater level of discernment as they engage in relationships.

Be open, be honest, be loving – be there for them. Continue to be the parent that you are and know that that is enough!